Short Funny Quotes and Sayings

1. That's the secret to life! replace one worry with another!!

2. I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.

3. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

4. No woman can be handsome by the force of features alone; any more that she can be witty by only the help of speech. - Kin Hubbard

5. Black Holes are where God divided by zero.

6. Friendship is like peeing in your pants. Everyone can see it but only you can feel its true warmth. Thank you for being the pee in my pants!!

7. (_!_) An ass

(__!__) Fat ass

(!) Tight ass

(_?_) Dumb ass

(_*_) Sore ass

(_zzz_) Tired ass

(_E=mc2_) Smart ass

(_x_) Kiss my ass!!

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