Short Funny Sayings and Quotes

1. Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit.

2. I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best. - Oscar Wilde

3. Dolphins: Don't trust a species that's always smiling, its up to something!

4. I only have SEX on days that begin with T: Thanksgiving. Tuesday. Thursday. Today. Tomorrow. Thaturday. thunday.. Tevery day!

5. Brigands demand your money or your life; women require both. - Samuel Butler

6. Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine.

7. Bugs are Sons of Glitches!

8. The quickest way of ending a war is to lose it.

9. Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish. - Euripides

10. Do you have room in your life for another friend?